Let The Little Children Come
Over the last 2 years our church has scaled back some of our children's programs during the service - we have a nursery for infants, a seperate room for toddlers where they can learn about Jesus on their level and a room for moms (or dads) when they just need a few minutes alone to care for basic necessities, a little down time or some correction. Children grades K5 - 6th (apart from a couple of children with some more serious disabilities) spend most of their time in our service with mom and dad - no longer relegated to the basement. My son in particular, currently in 2nd grade, has been sitting in the service each week next to his mom.
This was not a strategic or theological shift per se - it happened a bit more organically. It has not been without a few challenges but by and large the new pattern has been a rich blessing for our church. More children has meant more noise - more children has also meant more intentional conversations - about the Lord's supper, singing, teaching and what the church is all about. As the primary teacher on Sundays, I have enjoyed seeing (and hearing) children in our service. Rarely, if ever, do I walk away on a Sunday feeling the children were a distraction (usually the phone habits of adults is more distracting than children).
Toby Sumpter has written a very helpful article about how to help the young people in our church benefit from the corporate gathering of the church and what to do on those occasions when little hands or feet have a hard time sitting still, you can find that article here.
I would offer a strong support to his suggestions.
One thing I would add is that too often we expect too little of the children in our church. I know that each child interacts and learns in different ways, but how often do we as parents or leaders think - a child will get nothing out of this sermon or service? In my experience, this is not the case. My wife tyically brings a bag of snacks, some simple toys and some writing utensils to help our son navigate the 75 minute service - there are often multiple trips to the restroom, crinkled up cheeze-it packages and an occasional loud outburst of noise. Sometimes I wonder - is he even listening? Is he learning anything? I have had multiple occasions recently where I have learned my seven year old son is paying far closer to attention than I realized. On one occasion I had used an illustration of playing hide and go seek with my sons - observing how they often hide in plain sight and I have to pretend not to see them - my son was practically in tears because he interpreted my story as suggesting that he was dumb - which was not the point at all - but - he was listening - very intently - to the point he was hurt by my story. On another occasion, he was writing on a note pad, seemingly dissinterested in the sermon when I was telling a story about a former deacon at another church, who similar to Judas, was secretly scheming behind my back. My son stopped & asked his mom - why would this deacon not like dad - is that person here at this church - what did dad do.
My point is that our children, if given the opportunity can listen to and learn much from the preaching at our church even if some of the teaching is beyond their comprehension. In fact as a pastor, having children in the room has reminded me to make sure I speak in such a way that everyone can learn - no matter how old or young they are. Your children can learn much more in the gathering of the church than you realize.
Don't be afraid to keep them in the service - they are always welcome at Misiso Church. Don't assume they will not benefit form sitting and listening (instead of listening to music on headphones or watching Dora) - they can learn. Don't forget they are watching you - when you are not paying attention, not singing, on your phone, getting up and walking around - they are learning - but probably not the lessons you want them to learn.
Jesus invited the children to come to him and even offered a word of rebuke to those adults who kept children from him. Perhaps we should reconsider those warnings - are we keeping our own children away from the gathering of the church because it is not a priority in our home? Are we keeping children away because they distract us or might distract us? Are we keeping children away beause our expectations are too low?
Let them come - let them learn - let them grow - you might find that the children actuallly have much to teach us as well.